Before, I used to think that friendship is mean everything in my life, It's really took a very important position in my life right after my family. But something happened recently makes me realize that actually, " friendship" is not EVERYTHING, but they are only SOMETHING in this life. Do you know how much I have lost just because of the stupid promises that we ever made? And oPps.. Did I ever told you that I hate people who cannot keep for the promises? I even have a so-do-I-Call- "the war of century" with the Bf just because I want to keep the promises as I think friendship is more important than relationship. But at the end, what I got is not what I wish. Haha..
Well, to be honest, yes, I did angry with you when you first told me about your final decision. Why? Because from the beginning til the end, I'm really working so hard to go and looking for all the admission information, financial support information, email to the Uni, asking for this and that and bla bla bla...And the reason why I am doing all this shit is because I'm really wish that all of us can go to the Uni together once again. And remember, who is the one saying that she is fed up with study and decided to start working after grad? Remember who said will give up the master because of none of her family was support her to go? and remember who are the rest that keep on encourage her and advice her not to give up because no matter how hard is the life is gonna be, but we promise to find the way to support the living cost and education fees all by our self? But after a while, I decided to just forgot about it. I make up my mind to stop angry of her as I remembered what is written in the prayer-" Our Father in heaven, please forgive us as we forgive those who sins against us". So, that is. What is the point for me to keep on angry with her? Even me myself is a sinner who is still waiting for the forgiveness from the Lord and what is my right to put the blame on her? That is her future, So If she think the decision she has made is worth for her, then just go ahead. I will always pray for her good luck. Besides, I should put the blame on myself too. I'm too depending on the others. Living alone means the end of the world for me. But I forgot, study is about oneself, we should not make the decision just because to follow what the others do. It is all about own future, own career, own pathway. Furthermore, I would like to say Thanks for Lee, you're right, we will meet lots more friends days by days after the class start. So if i'm really decided to go for the further study, there is no reason for me to worry about living alone in the new environment. Because I'm doing all of this for myself, not for the others. So I should'nt put my future on the other's shoulder. From now on, I should learn to be independent.
ps: Anyway, no matter what, I still heart all my pals so much...CheerSs. and if anyone feel this post is offensive, pls let me know, I will try to delete it as soon as possible. and if anyone of you feel hurt bcux of what i have wrote, i' would like to say sorry for that. I don't mean it, I just want to spit out my feeling in MY OWN LITTLE CORNER, my own blog, so there is nothing wrong right?
